Beware the sock-adorned doorknob
When it comes down to orchestrating dorm sex, communication is key
By: Leslie Cantu
Issue date: 2/13/03 Section: Sex-tion
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Communication. It is, as with so many things in life, the key to schtupping in the dorms. Now stop rolling your eyes, Oprah-haters. We're not talking about a party-ending heart-to-heart with your special someone, although knowing -- and using -- the name of your current bed buddy is the very least that is recommended.
What we're talking about today is open and honest communication with that other special someone in your life, that random stranger whose snores warm the cockles of your heart every night -- your roommate.
As we all know from watching tasteless teen comedies, the options for humiliation when fornicating in a dorm room are endless. Whether your roommate has wandered in at the moment of truth or whether you've awakened at 3 a.m. to discover you are set dressing for your roommate's in-house skin flick, or even if you've only heard a hilariously humbling tale about a cousin's friend's brother in Ohio, you realize the need for a little talk about the birds and the bees before your potential friendship is completely ruined.
Luckily the dorm resident of today is a pretty sophisticated individual, cognizant of the need for "private time." But the moms of today, even if they lived through the swinging seventies, don't necessarily like to hear that sweet little Susie is knocking boots with that nice young history major. And apparently more moms than students read The Journal. So, in the interests of protecting our fellow students from the wrath of the parents (or, the bank), no real names are used in this article.
Uncovering the etiquette of dorm nookie was not easy. Many residents claimed to be unfamiliar with the issue, leading us to believe that A) you lied to us, because we have heard some really good rumors, or B) we have been seriously misled by the movies and the life of a dorm resident is a sedate, studious one, with everyone settled down to watch the Discovery Channel by 4:20 every afternoon.
Nonetheless, some truths did come to light.
What we're talking about today is open and honest communication with that other special someone in your life, that random stranger whose snores warm the cockles of your heart every night -- your roommate.
As we all know from watching tasteless teen comedies, the options for humiliation when fornicating in a dorm room are endless. Whether your roommate has wandered in at the moment of truth or whether you've awakened at 3 a.m. to discover you are set dressing for your roommate's in-house skin flick, or even if you've only heard a hilariously humbling tale about a cousin's friend's brother in Ohio, you realize the need for a little talk about the birds and the bees before your potential friendship is completely ruined.
Luckily the dorm resident of today is a pretty sophisticated individual, cognizant of the need for "private time." But the moms of today, even if they lived through the swinging seventies, don't necessarily like to hear that sweet little Susie is knocking boots with that nice young history major. And apparently more moms than students read The Journal. So, in the interests of protecting our fellow students from the wrath of the parents (or, the bank), no real names are used in this article.
Uncovering the etiquette of dorm nookie was not easy. Many residents claimed to be unfamiliar with the issue, leading us to believe that A) you lied to us, because we have heard some really good rumors, or B) we have been seriously misled by the movies and the life of a dorm resident is a sedate, studious one, with everyone settled down to watch the Discovery Channel by 4:20 every afternoon.
Nonetheless, some truths did come to light.
